Friday, February 15, 2008

Happiness

It is sometimes difficult to know how much you had grown until you see a mirror image of yourself.

It was a quiet and awkward moment. The students are looking shyly around, checking each other up with downcast eyes or burrowing themselves in the various publications scattered around the Uni's foyer. No one made the first move or a bravado effort to speak to each other. The whole place felt like a cold disinfected library.

At that moment, I can really see myself transported back to February 2005, when I first stepped into the Uni. I as quiet and shy, always wanting to say Hello but just cannot move my jaw. I can felt the words at the tip of my tongue but they just stubbornly wouldn't go out. It was nearly two years later before I am quite satisfied with the amount of friends I have in Uni.

Just there and then, I decided to make sure they would not encounter the same problem as I did. I approached them one by one, making small conversations and introduced them to each other. I attacked everyone in the room. Hey how are you? What's your name? Where are you from? Had you met?... At the end of my efforts, the room was abuzz. They are talking to each other, forming small cliques, exchanging phone numbers.

I looked at them across the room, just like sitting in front of the PC watching the animated figurines in SimCity, satisfied with what I had done. That's when I suddenly tasted that ever exclusive slice of happiness. The tingling, emotional sensation you only felt when you achieve something special. The sudden realisation that you had grown up so much since your first day at uni. The moment you are aware that "oh, I just did that." Oh, it was so, so sweet.

Happiness.

Looking back at my exploits yesterday, I am still pinching myself to believe what had happened. I had managed to speak to each and every one of the 36 new International students. I managed to convince and cajole them to join optional orientation activities. I even got to go on stage and share my experiences to these groups of students and have them laughing at my jokes like a seasoned pro.

Damn, if you told me in February 2005 that I can do that three years later, I would never believe you. I would had told you "dream on".

I was so happy that I felt that I got to tell you all this, eventhough you may think I'm arrogant and cocky and proud and whatever. Who cares.

I had just lived my dream.

3 comments:

AW said...

Congratulations. Glad that you've found priceless happiness and satisfaction from all those efforts. I am sure that's just a beginning of something even bigger. :)

Arthur said...

wow.. that's very nice of you. oh come on.. u r not bragging. u r just sharing yr joy with us, n we love to read them.

those who find u bragging r just shallow n envious bcuz they can't achieve something for themselves. they prefer to fill the world with more negativities. sad people, i know. lol.

Aleckii said...

Haha! Ya, I know boon Phiaw from way back when. Shy guy... Apparently not anymore! Heehee!

Happy New Year from your ex-classmate here in Russia. Oh, by the way, did you know that Kao Siang is my roommate right now? What are the odds, right?