Sunday, June 07, 2009

The attractive theory

A lady named Abby Wong wrote a beautiful article in The Star that had became the talk of the paper. The piece first appeared on 24th May and till today, someone was still commenting on it.

What  was it about? Well… drum roll…. she seems to think that guys reading in public are attractive. Wow. Why didn’t she write it earlier? Damn, with that insight  I would have read all my novels in shopping centres and bus stops instead of while curling in my bed. Oh, now I can’t bear to count the number of lost opportunities…

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Being educated in the scientific method, I decided to put the theory into practice. From that week,  I strolled across the corridors of the hospital appearing to be deeply absorbed in the pieces of paper I was carrying.  When I had free time in the pharmacy,I read a book.

Alas, I can’t spy any adoring glances, nor hear any hushed whispers saying “he is so attractive!”. The only comment was “Wow you are so hardworking.”

So much for Abby Wong’s theory. She had gotten it so wrong.

Let’s try my theory: Girls find boys who cooks attractive. They will positively drool dreaming about waking up to the smell of freshly brewed coffee tantalizing their nostrils and the melodious sound of luscious vegetables being chopped into bite sizes ringing in their ears. They fantasizes going home after a tired day of work to find piping hot spaghetti ala carbonara waiting for them on the table.

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The next thing to do is to prove it. So last week I baked a cheesecake to work and share it around.

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After getting my word that it was really me who created such delicious fare, here came the questions:

Question 1: Are you still single?

Question 2: What’s your criteria of a girlfriend?

Question 3: Are you willing to consider a girl a few years older than you?

Question 4: Maybe I should introduce my cousin to you.

I swear its true.

It was hence proven that guys that can cook is a much more attractive commodity. But then there’s a problem, we can’t just push a stove into any public place and proceed to cook our breakfast on the spot, can we?

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Disclaimer: This is not, I stress, REALLY NOT a piece of self advertising.

1 comment:

Galahad said...

Abby Wong is the new Nikki Gemmell, Catherine Millet, Germaine Greer and Shirley Valentine. Controlling feminism fantasist.

Intelligent, educated types who reads, cooks and do all the housework? Dashing Mediterranean types who talk about their feelings? Please. This is stock-standard stuff for any insecure chick over 30. Traditional gender roles are inverted, and the guy's vulnerability and inexperience is used as a way of exploring well-worn themes of possession, control and female empowerment.

Sure, there are plentiful paternalistic males out there, but to be fair, we should start to cross-examine gender equity and respect, not immature self-adsorbed wishful thinking.

Abby may be writing the widest dreamed chick literature, but to me, it seems like a stern warning to every man who's ever forgotten to put down the toilet seat or switched on the news while his wife was telling him about her day". Good luck on finding that special one, Abby.